Happenings….

I have been working on checking things off my “to-do” list today.  And it feels good.  We move in less than a month, and I am finally getting a little bit excited-about moving into our new house, not about leaving my neighbors whom I love dearly!

Our new house has five bedrooms, 2300 square feet, and a large back yard.  It is right across the river from one of the public pools, and just a couple of blocks from the weekly farmer’s market, library, and bank.  I love the character and feel of this house-it was built in 1900, and I really love older houses.  I don’t love the plaster walls, but I love the hardwood floors!

God has done some really neat things for us.  We thought we would be moving to a different city, and a different school district.  We were all struggling with it, and continued asking God to open and shut doors to move us into the right house and the right neighborhood.

Then the day came that several doors swung open for us.  A friend had been praying about childcare for her children, and felt led to ask me if I would be willing to take her two little girls for the next couple of years.  This was an answer to prayer for her and me both!  This opened the door to this five bedroom house, and to our sons being able to stay in the same school district, and peace for us all.

I am so thankful that the boys can continue (Will is starting 9th grade) at Appleton North, and I am looking forward to having a couple of little girls in our home!  I know that the way my life looks will change, but I am ready and willing.  I know God has great things in store for us, and I look forward to what He wants to teach me!

We are still doing foster care.  We had the opportunity to do some long term respite care for a little one, but with packing and moving, I didn’t sense that it would be wise for us to take that on.  But, we are still excited about being able to help out families by loving and caring for their little ones until they are ready to do it on their own.

Well, I have a pile of clothes on my bed that need to be organized and put into their places…some storage, some Goodwill, and the rest back into the closet!

Have a blessed day!

 

Trusting His “Abba” Heart

A few nights ago, Chris was reading me a couple of verses to encourage me.  I was irritated with the verses.  Not a “shake my fist at God” kind of irritated, but a “don’t promise me things that won’t happen” type of irritation.  I didn’t want Chris, or God, to get my hopes up, only to be disappointed.

I have no doubts that God “can” do anything, but I have really had a hard time believing He “would” do something for us.  There have been some pretty big things that I’ve asked Him to do (like heal my back), which He has chosen not to do-for whatever reason.  He knows.

But I realized that I have been wrestling with something that I’ve never (or at least in a really long time) wrestled with before.  I woke up that night and the first verse that popped into my head was Proverbs 3:5-6.

Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart,

lean not on your own understanding,

in all your ways acknowledge Him

and He will direct Your path.

He woke me up and whispered to me, “Please-trust me.  You can trust me.  You know you can trust me!”

As I lay there thinking about His words, I realized that I’ve been wrestling with trusting His heart for me.  His “Daddy’s heart” for me.  His longing to hold me and comfort me, to see me light up with joy, to see me running to Him with my aches and fears, and with my dreams and desires.  To trust that He will hold my heart tenderly, and He would never bring me pain unless there was a very good reason for it.

And it makes me so sad that I have held Him at a distance, because I was afraid to trust.  I sit here writing with tears flowing, because in my heart of hearts I know that He is oh-so-worthy of my trust.  I let fear, and not His love, control me.  As dear friends reminded me last night,  “Perfect love casts out fear.”  It’s either one or the other.  And I’m done with choosing fear.  I choose His perfect love.

(In case you are wondering, yes-I did tell Him all this!)

This song is a bit older (sung by Twila Paris in the 80′s), but the words have been echoing in my mind the past several days, and I wanted to share them with you.

Do I Trust You, Lord

Sometimes, my little heart can’t understand what’s in Your will, and what’s in Your plan

So many times, I’m tempted to ask You why

But, I can never forget it for long, Lord, what You do could not be wrong

So, I believe You-even when I must cry

Do I trust You, Lord?  Does the river flow?

Do I trust You, Lord?  Does the north wind blow?

You can see my heart; You can read my mind

And You’ve got to know I would rather die than to lose my faith in the one I love

Do I trust You, Lord?

Do I trust You?

I know the answers; I’ve given them all

but suddenly now, I feel so small

shaken down to the cavity in my soul

I know the doctrine and theology, but right now,

they don’t mean much to me

This time, there’s only one thing I’ve got to know.

Do I trust You, Lord?  Does the robin sing?

Do I trust You, Lord?  Does it rain in spring?

You can see my heart; You can read my mind

And You’ve got to know I would rather die than to lose my faith in the one I love

Do I trust You, Lord?

Do I trust You?

{YES}

I will trust You, Lord, when I don’t know “why”

I will trust You, Lord, til the day I die

I will trust You, Lord, when I’m blind with pain

You were God before and You’ll never change

I will trust You,

I will trust You.

I will trust You, Lord!

The Dimholt Road

Lord, I don’t even know what to write. 

I feel like I owe an explanation to those who read my blog.  And yet, I don’t know how to put into words what has been going on inside of me this past month.  Help!!

Hi, friends!  It is bright and early, and this is only the second day that I have been awake before 8:00 am.  Very unlike the usual me, but that was the me of this past month.  After being sick and being in bed during those weeks, I think it took a toll on my back and caused a flare up of inflammation.  A lot of pain.  I would stay in bed after I woke up, laying on the heating pad, and giving my medicine a chance to kick in, in order to be able to move about and get ready for the day.  And then, I would usually get back into bed with my heating pad.

I don’t know exactly what happened, or how, but I found myself on a downwards cycle.  I was so very sad and discouraged about this chronic back pain, I was emotionally exhausted from trying to do things I wasn’t meant to do, I was mentally weary with trying to find a house for us to move into, and I was a wreck physically.

One morning, I didn’t pick up my Bible to read.  I talked to God a lot that day, and for the next several days.  I listened to Him.  I received encouragement in the form of Scripture and true words from friends and family, but I didn’t “invest” in my relationship with God.  I stopped reading and studying His Word.  I became more and more discouraged, and found myself in this cycle.

It wasn’t like I was mad at God.  I think I just wasn’t “feeling” His love for me and decided subconsciously that maybe watching a show on Netflix, or reading a book would get my mind off the pain and sickness and all the unknown.

Knowing what God says about the human nature, it shouldn’t surprise me, but….

it’s hard to admit that as much as I love Him and His Word, and as much as I believe that only by being with Him and in His Word can I have true peace, that I allowed a lie to reign over me for such a long time.

My mom sent me a blog post one day.  The gist of it being that rest is grace, it is a gift from God.  We cannot work to deserve rest.  (Seriously, people, this is huge for me.  Very goal oriented here.)

On that day, God began to tug at my heart and ask me to come back and read again His letter to me.  His love letter to me.

It has been several days since that day, and I have not spent much time in His Word.  But,  God has continued to remind me that He does indeed love me.  That the good that He has planned for me is not necessarily easy.  But He does love me.  Asking me to please believe it, and to let Him tell me about it.  To teach me and revive my soul.

Because He loves me.

A few things have happened in the past few days which have jolted me into reality.

First, I had started taking some natural supplements to see if that would reduce the inflammation in my body.  I really think this is working.  It’s not completely gone, by any means, but along with the other things that I take, I’ve actually had moments in the past couple of days that I am pain-free!!

Secondly, we received a phone call about potential foster children.  That certainly woke me up.  It turns out that we didn’t get any one yet, but it something that God used to “revive” me.  More like shock treatment, actually!

Thirdly, we had Life Group at our house this past Friday.  It did my heart good to be with friends that I love and that love Jesus and simply want to follow Him.  I was humbled by the prayer of the newest Christ-follower in our group, who started out praying by praising and worshiping God for who He is, and what He has done for us.

Fourthly, we started a series on God’s love for us at church.  The time of worship through singing was a balm to my soul.  A hug for my heart.

I believe I can say with David,

“He reached down from on high and took hold of me; He drew me out of deep waters.  He rescued me from my powerful enemy, from my foes, who were too strong for me.  They confronted me in the day of my disaster, but the LORD was my support.  He brought me out into a spacious place; He rescued me because He delighted in me.”  2 Samuel 22:17-20

My heart leaps when I read those words!

Maybe this post will disappoint you, maybe not.  But I felt it was unfair to pretend that this past month didn’t happen and that all was normal and well.  I believed a lie.  I don’t think I was conscious of that at the beginning, but if I had picked up my Bible on those first days, I’m sure He would have pointed it out.

I had moments of great encouragement and very many moments of deep sadness and sobbing.

I do believe that there is a spacious place before me.  I imagine a space like on the opening scene of The Sounds of Music, when Maria is singing without her wimple…The dark crevices of last month (I’m imagining the Dimholt Road of Return of the Kings)  are right behind me, though, and I don’t want to turn around and run back in there.  Why anyone would do that, I do not know.  But I know myself well enough to admit that I sometimes, so many times,  make really foolish decisions.

I will take it one day at a time.  One moment at a time, if necessary.  I’m hoping that being in the fresh air and sunshine of God’s love will revive me and remind me who I am to God.  That my relationship with Him really does matter to Him.  He really does love me.

So, I’m not sure if this is what you wanted to hear, but it’s my heart.  Thanks for hearing it out!!

 

 

 

In His Presence…Day Eleven

Maywood Environmental Park-photo by Terri Balint

Friday, February 15th, 2013  10:58am

Lord, I wish I were sitting, or even walking, through Maywood right now.  I think my heart needs the beauty and I think my body needs the fresh air.  The past couple of days have been a downright battle.  Struggling with whatever is going on inside of me.  A vicious cycle that I need to get out of, but how?

I’m sure I’ve gone through this before, but I am a slow learner.  Thick-headed.  I need to learn how to live with chronic pain.  Would I wish it all away if I could?  I don’t know.  I hate living with the pain, I’m tired of living with the pain.  I don’t know how to do it.  But, if the pain is what is pushing me towards you, then I need it.  But, really?  Couldn’t there be an easier way?

There are so many questions and thoughts running around in my head right now.  And a lot of them, I can’t write here, because I’m afraid that I would hurt someone’s feelings or offend someone.  No negative thoughts about anyone else, but thoughts about who I am, who did You create me to be.  Seriously, I am trying to figure that out.

On one hand, I wonder if it really matters.  A part of me says, “just suck it up and do what comes your way.”  But when handfuls of stuff come my way every day, am I supposed to do it all?  I know my family is supposed to be my priority, but they haven’t been.  Lord, forgive me for not even seeing that is what I was doing.  Other things that take my energy, and then here I am, out of energy way before my day is done.  I am headed to bed two hours before the kids are done with their day, simply because I have nothing left.  Physically or emotionally.

So, what is draining my energy?  I really do think it is because I am not being true to how you put me together.  But is it right to take that into account?  Am I supposed to think about that when I am picking and choosing what to do or what not to do?

You know I am confused.  I’m sure You know better than me why my pain is affecting me the way that it is.  I know that You understand it, even though I don’t.  What do I need?  I love that You brought Sunny into my life, into my heart.  Our conversation yesterday was so encouraging to me, and her one simple suggestion “why don’t you get some fresh air?” has started me thinking about You and this vicious cycle that I am in.  I just appreciate that she understands, and knows that there are no answers that will make it better.  Even as I was reading “The Secret Garden”, it took her comment to make me understand what steps I can take to get out of this cycle.

In some ways, it seems so silly that this is what is bogging me down, when I am looking towards Your crucifixion and sacrifice.  But I want to be real with You.  I can’t pretend, You see my heart.  And so somehow, I know that You will use all of this in my life, and You will show Yourself to me, and You will awe me and amaze me with Your love, Your mercy and Your grace.

“That is why the LORD says, Turn to me now, while there is time.  Give me your hearts.  Come with fasting, weeping and mourning.

Don’t tear your clothing in your grief, but tear your hearts instead.  Return to the LORD, your God, for He is merciful and compassionate,

slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love.  He is eager to relent and not punish.  Who knows? 

Perhaps He will give you a reprieve, sending you a blessing instead of a curse.”  Joel 2:12-14

*****

“Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.”  Matthew 6:21

*****

“I will praise the Lord at all times.  I will constantly speak His praises.  I will boast only in the Lord; let all who are helpless take heart.

Come, let us tell of the Lord’s greatness, let us exalt His name together.  I prayed to the Lord, and He answered me.  He freed me from all

my fears.  Those who look to Him for help will be radiant with joy; no shadow of shame will darken their faces.” Psalm 34:1-5

*****

“Does anyone want to live a life that is long and prosperous?  Then keep y0ur tongue from speaking evil

and your lips from telling lies!  Turn away from evil and do good.”

“Search for peace, and work to maintain it…The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; He rescues those whose spirits are crushed.

The righteous person faces many troubles, but the Lord comes to the rescue each time.”  Psalm 34:12-13, 18-19

*****

“Before daybreak the next morning, Jesus got up and went out to an isolated place to pray.”  Mark 1:35

****

“But Jesus replied, ‘We must go on to other towns as well, and I will preach to them, too.  That is why I came.”  Mark 1:38

****

Lord, please help me to fill in these blanks.  I want to be like You.

I must__________, and I will__________, too.  That is why I am here.

In His Presence…Day Ten

Tuesday, February 12, 2013 3:53am

Well, I love getting up early, but I was hoping that I would get another hour of sleep.  Oh, well!  Will remember to take another melatonin tonight, so my back doesn’t wake me up too early tomorrow!!

So many people on my mind as I woke up this morning.  People that need Your healing touch, people that simply need You, friends that need the strength to keep putting one foot in front of the other…Lord, make each of these people that I have been praying for aware of Your presence and Your power.  Draw them close to You and either open their eyes to the salvation You offer, or remind them of Your promises to them in this day.

I also woke up thinking about all that I am involved in.  Haven’t thought about that for a while.  I must be starting to feel better!  Lord, I thank You-I truly do-for these weeks of being sick.  My heart breaks for poor L, who has been sick for so much longer, I can’t imagine.  But, I am thankful for this time You gave me.  I’ve often talked about just holding time still to give me a minute to think about everything and try to catch up in my mind with what is going on in my life, and though time didn’t stop, You certainly gave me a pause.  A Sabbath for my body, soul and spirit.

While I know that I have committed to not putting anything on the calendar through the month of February, You made it so simple for me the first couple of weeks.  I did have to say no a couple of times, not easy, but I know it is what I was supposed to do.  Going forward, I am still trying to find a frame for the picture of my life.  What are the boundaries that are healthy for me to put up?  This is so hard for me to even think about!!!!

I need Your wisdom, Lord.  You promise me in the book of James that if any one asks for wisdom, not wavering, You will give it to them.  So this is me, asking for Your wisdom.  I know that You have thoughts about this, and maybe Your heart’s desire is for me to truly lean in to listen to You and ask myself on a situation by situation basis “Father, is this what You want me to do”, but You also created me.  You know I run best on a track, and so I am asking that You give me a track to run on.  Some guidelines that I can use in filtering all the opportunities that come my/our way.

Chris asked me yesterday how it was to blog through the book of Leviticus.  And you know the dread that my heart was feeling as I realized this is the book I would be reading during this month.  But, You are faithful to show me something about Yourself in this book.  I have loved it.  I was wondering about using a different reading plan, preparing for Easter, starting tomorrow.  Not sure-want to look at it, but also need Your wisdom.  I don’t know that I have the time to do both, and I see the beauty of both reading plans, so I would just love Your thoughts.  What does my heart need over the next 6 weeks?

Lord, put a guard over my home, my heart and my mind as I open my Bible and read today.  Help me to see You in what I read.  Teach my heart, and give me the opportunities to put into practice what I read and learn.  I do not want to be only a hearer, but I want to be a doer.  I love You, and I want to reflect You!!!

Leviticus 18-19

I understand most of chapter 18-no questions as to the whys or what-fors.  He told them “don’t do as they did in the Egypt…don’t do as they are going to do in Canaan”  Do/don’t do what I am telling You now.  Stick to what I say, and You will live.  “I am the LORD, Your God.  Keep my decrees and laws, for whoever obeys them will live by them.  I am the LORD.“  vs 4b-5

But as I go into chapter 19, and start reading, I am asking myself.  How do we know which laws we are still supposed to follow, and which we are not?

I understand that sacrificial laws no longer apply.  Jesus was the last sacrifice offered, because His sacrifice was perfect, pure, and complete.  But here, You are telling Moses “Do not go about spreading slander among your people.“  and then four verses later, “Do not wear clothing made of two kinds of material“.   You say “Do not practice divination or seek omens” and the next verse says, “Do not cut the hair at the sides of your head or clip off the edges of your beard.”

The first commands I understand, I get it, Jesus taught about those things when He was here on earth.  But what about the second examples?  Mixing materials or cutting one’s hair or beard?  We do those things all the time in this day.   I know we are not under the law anymore.  Are we supposed to live by those things which were not only in the law, but that You also continued to teach when You were here?  Or that You told us specifically that something had changed?  I can see where so much confusion comes in when we are not getting to know Your entire Scripture.

Paul told Timothy (2 Timothy 3:15b-17) that “from infancy you have known the Holy Scriptures (which, at that time, was the Older Testament), which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.  All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that all God’s people may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”  So, how do I know which parts to hold tightly to, and which to consider “of the past”?

This is the reason that people judge one another and local churches pop up all over.  Because we all have different ideas as to what is “following Your commands”  and what is “disobedience”.  Oh, for clarity, and then unity with one another!

Give me Your wisdom as I dig in, so that I will hold tightly to the things which are from You and hold very loosely to my own ideas.

Psalm 13

“How long, O Lord?  Will You forget me forever?“…”How long must I wrestle with my thoughts, and day after day have sorrow in my heart?“

Oh, yes-I remember times that I have felt like that.  That circumstance that had my stomach in knots and my heart hurting desperately-I remember this last time so well.  It still hurts when I dwell on it-when I start thinking about why it happened, and what I want to happen.  I would still love to see change come about.  But there is nothing that I can do-my hands are tied in this situation, and I think my peace is because I truly do believe what is written in verses 5-6.

“But I trust in Your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in Your salvation.  I will sing the LORD’s praise, for He has been good to me.”

These words are truth, and I want to live based on truth instead of on what I am feeling.  Although You know that a lot of the time, my feelings do line up with Your truths, there are those times when I have not felt like the promises that I claimed.  And I know that resting (truly resting) in Your promises is one of the things that leads to peace in my heart.  And I need Your peace.

You love me, You never will stop.  There is nothing that I can ever do to change Your love for me.

You have saved me!!!  If this is all I had to cling to, it would still be enough.  I know that I have an eternity with You set before me.  I never again have to worry about being banished from presence forever.  Oh, that is peace and joy!!!

You know all my favorite songs that I like to put on when I am going through a rough time.  Especially the one that reminds me that You inhabit the praises of Your people.  (Psalm 22)   I know this to be true, and I think that praising You during the difficult times is sweeter than praising You during the times of refreshing and rejoicing.  I say this, and then I think that actually, the hard times are often the times of refreshing.  You are like a wave that gently washes over me, cooling me off and cleaning me up.  Or maybe I just feel it more because of being in the heat of battle.

You have been good to me.  When I am having a “down” day,  it doesn’t take long for my heart to change as I start to remember all the many different ways in which You have been good to me.  You have blessed me in so many ways, and there is really nothing like pulling me out of a hard time than to start listing all the things that I am thankful for.

Acts 19

Paul gets a chance to go back to Ephesus and ends up spending over two years there, having daily discussions about the kingdom of God.  A few things that I found interesting were:

vs 2-the word translated “believed” is the word “emunah”, meaning firm action…firm action towards God’s will.  It is not so much a faith in one’s mind, but more of a faith that results in action.  Paul asks the disciples “Did you receive the Holy Spirit when you came to {emunah}?”  And they said that no, they did not even know about a Holy Spirit.  They told him they were baptized with John’s baptism.  What I understand is that John’s baptism was of repentance looking forward to Christ?  or saying “yes, I believe that the Messiah is on His way.” After Paul explained that what John had preached had come to pass-the Messiah had come, had died, was buried and rose again,  they wanted to be baptized into Christ, and so, Paul baptized them (full body immersion) in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ.  Then Paul placed his hands on them and the Holy Spirit came on them.  Why does it say it this way?  If we are given the Holy Spirit as a seal automatically at salvation, why did Paul need to place his hands on them?  Or is this something different?   I need better understanding.  Lord, please teach me.

Okay, now that I have been awake for three hours, I am ready to go back to bed.  But, too late!  The kids will be getting up soon.  I should rest this morning, trying to be careful to not overdo it.  Don’t want to have a relapse!  Lord, as I think about what I have read today, I feel like I have more questions than answers.  I have so much to learn about You.  I will today be claiming Psalm 13:5-6.  Even though I’m a tad overwhelmed by what I read,  I will…

“trust in Your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in Your salvation.

I will sing the Lord’s praise, for He has been good to me.”

 

 

 

In His Presence…Day Nine

Monday, February 11, 2013  4:05am

It has been a few weeks since I’ve woken up this early.  I’m taking that as a sign that I am starting to heal…  I’m not gonna make the same mistake as Saturday and overdo it.  Did not work out so well.

I don’t know if it’s because it’s early, or because I spent so much time talking to You yesterday, but I don’t seem to have much on my mind this morning.  There is lots I’m thinking about, but not anything that I am really burdened about.

You are good, and what You do is good.  (Psalm 119:68)

Reading Leviticus 15-17

A few things that stand out to me….

Certainly not much privacy in that time.  Did everyone know what was going on all the time because of the sacrifices and ceremonial cleaning that one had to make?  Is it pride that makes me thankful for the fact that my sin is first and foremost between me and You, Lord?  I understand that my sin can affect, or be against others, and I need to make that right as it happens.  But, I have seen the way that people judge and condemn, and I’m so glad that with You it is different.  Once I confess my sin to You, You no longer hold it over my head or use it against me.  I am grateful for that.

I love reading about the Day of Atonement, but even more than that, understanding what a beautiful truth is being foreshadowed.  The High Priest was only allowed to go into Your presence once a year, and in a certain manner, prescribed by You.

Now, we “have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain….let us draw near to God with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith.”  Hebrews 10:19-22

Whereas the High Priest once a year entered that Most Holy Place, we now can come before You at any time.  Not carelessly however, and I think sometimes I forget this.  We don’t get to do this because WE have become worthy, but because we are putting FULL ASSURANCE in the fact that Jesus blood has cleansed us.  And the fact  that He is always interceding for us.  He is the “smoke of the incense” that fills that Most Holy Place.  It is with boldness, not “brazenness”, that we come before You.

I love the picture of the High Priest, coming before You in His simple linen tunic.  White linen garments always speak of righteousness in Your Word, and I believe that this is a picture of Christ’s righteousness that stands before God.  But I also love how the High Priest had to strip himself of everything that denoted who he was-his normal garments-layers and all his ornamental dress, and it was simply him in linen garments.  Just reminds me of the truth that there is nothing that I have to offer God.  I need to strip myself of all but the righteousness of Jesus Christ.  That is the only way I should be coming before God.  Lord, give me caution as I approach the Throne.  Not to make me hesitant, but to make me dependent on You.  Your blood.  Your righteousness.

I love the picture of the scapegoat, being sent out “into some remote place” to get lost.  I understand in my head that You took away my sins (John 1:29), that when I confess my sins to You, You don’t remember them anymore (Hebrews 8:12).  Why is it that I can’t forget them?  Is it because I don’t believe it?  That I can just imagine that scapegoat finding its way back into camp?

I do believe it, though.  Why is it, that of all the things I remember, it’s the things that I don’t want to remember?  Why can’t it be the things that I need to remember?

What is more rehearsed in my mind?

Hmm…something to think about.

And You bring to mind, Philippians 4:8, “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, , whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things.”

Also, Colossians  3:2-3 “Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.  For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God.”  I love that picture of me being hidden in the “smoke of the incense”-Christ’s petitions to the Father-interceding for me.  Thank you, Jesus.

And I get the answer to my question from a few days ago about the reason for not eating the blood.  Verse 11 of chapter 17 says, “For the life of the creature is in the blood, and I have given it to You to make atonement for yourselves on the altar: it is the blood that makes atonement for one’s life.”

The blood was set apart for atonement.  It wasn’t perfect blood, and that’s why it had to be repeated over and over and over again.  But, it was the means by which God’s wrath was satisfied so that we could be reconciled with Him.  And so for that reason, it was, just like all things that were holy unto the Lord, not to be eaten.  When Christ’s blood was shed, it was perfect blood, and so that sacrifice only had to be made once, because it covered all the sacrifices in the past, and it covered all the sins in its future.

There were so many things that I wanted to look into further, but the kids will be getting up soon, and I still need to read Acts 18.

One thing stands out to me about Apollos.  It says “He was a learned man, with a thorough knowledge of the Scriptures.  He had been instructed in the way of the Lord, and he spoke with great fervor and taught about Jesus accurately, though he knew only the baptism of John.” vs 24b and 25

I am sure that God had gifted him to speak boldly and refute Scripture, but the thing that stands out to me is “he was a learned man, with a thorough knowledge of the Scriptures.”  Thorough means “exhaustively complete; painstakingly accurate or careful” and I am intrigued by the fact that this man knew God’s Word like that.  It says that after Priscilla and Aquila had “explained the way of God more adequately”, he wanted to go to Achaia, and when he got there, “he was a great help to those who by grace had believed”.  I can’t help but think that this knowledge of God’s Word is the means by which he was able to do this.  He was able to “vigorously refute the Jews in public debate, proving from the Scriptures that Jesus was the Messiah”.

It is just another reason to commit myself to thoroughly studying Your Word.  I think that I would be more effective when I refute those who argue against You, and try to deny that You are the Messiah.  Am I correct in my thinking that I should be more focused on gaining knowledge of Your Word, rather than on what I am to do with it?  Lord, please continue to give me a hunger and desire to understand this wonderful book that You have given us.  I hesitate to call it just a book-it is more than that, so much more.

Lord, help my focus to be on You and Your Word.  And let all the other things going on in my life fall where they may.  Let me filter every word that goes out of my mouth, and every word or thought that comes into my head and heart, through Your Word-Your truth.

 

In His Presence…Day Eight

Sunday, February 10th, 2013  4:24pm

Lord, today is one of those days that my heart is so burdened for someone else.  I cannot imagine the ache their heart is feeling right now.  The weight of what to do, what to say, a desperate desire to make things better, but how?  What is Your will?   What is Your plan?  I come before You now, asking that You pour out Your Spirit on my friend.  That You will comfort with Your power and Your presence.

In You is our hope, our joy, our true healing, our life…  Lord, let them stand in Your presence and be bathed in Your love.

Lord, let them trust in You as their anchor.  Let them see the future that You have planned for us.  Because of the victory that You won!  Give them eyes to see what is eternal…to fix their eyes upon You.

You are worthy of our trust.  Sometimes, it is so hard to feel it, but it doesn’t change the fact that it is true.  So, Lord, give them the courage and strength to claim Your promises.  You will never leave us or forsake us.  There is nothing that can separate us from Your love.

Lord, please wrap Your arms around them, and overwhelm them with Your presence.  Lord, please quiet them with Your love.